Of course everyone has opinions of what to do and what not to do when your kids reach this age. Depending on the setting you hear anywhere from Instagram is alright but not FB, FB is alright but not twitter, I let me kids listen to Justin Beiber he's alright because (fill in the blank), or I let my kids watch Hunger Games because they know it's fake it's not real killing, Twilight is simple romance or they watched Harry Potter because everything is Disney magic anyways, monster high dolls are just dolls like Barbies, of course boy/girl parties are alright at 14 because I've taught them not to bad stuff (whatever line they have arbitrarily set & told themselves the bad stuff is). The lines and rules can make you dizzy with decisions.
I'm reminded of 1 Corinthians 10:23 "Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial. Everything is permissible, but not everything is constructive."
I could write a ton of what my own convictions are or speak from some of my soap boxes but why? I mean, really, they are just that my opinions. Rather, around my house these days I keep directing my girls to the Word of God which is always correct and always perfect. Never a word misspoken…just Truth. My opinions are just that, my opinions.
When faced today with a crazy insane amount of choices thrown our way as parents. Every day we are faced with questions from our kids for a new social media site to connect to, or an new app, a new song, a new book or movie. There are so many lines, we as parents, are left asking ourselves if that is a black or white answer or is that a gray zone. Lately, when we we are asked if they can do something I have turned it around and now ask them a question. Is what you are asking us to do permissible or beneficial?
Not in a legalistic sense. Simply from a heart perspective on what will benefit them and not hold them back or make them stumble in an area.
The heart is the wellspring of life and we are to guard it. We know that out of the heart the mouth speaks….so those are truths we have learned from the beginning. To follow that line of thinking out, whatever we are putting in our hearts will come back out….eventually and inevitably.
While, you can do all the gray areas that are permissible in your life I leave them with the question…will it benefit your life? And if yes, how?
We are teaching them at this age to ask God for themselves what He has for their lives. Like I said, my oldest is 14. I have 4 years left before she goes away to college and will be making so many of her decisions on her own. I want her and and my other 2 girls to learn the voice of the Holy Spirit speaking to them on their own. To know right and wrong and to discern what is alright to put in their hearts and what is not. To decipher the difference between things that are permissible and you can get away with and the things that are beneficial. I know a few adults that could benefit from learning this lesson, too. It would save them a world of hurt and addiction.
As you are parenting your tweens and teens today, take a moment and ask yourself that same question for your own life. Is this that I am about to watch, listen to or do simply permissible or will it be beneficial in my own walk with God and then teach your kids that same concept. Give yourselves and your kids a Biblical gauge to remember when making choices.
Permissible or beneficial? Your choice.
***As a side note, if you've said yes to anything especially social media continue asking them questions, check up on their accounts to see what is going on. Always be involved and connected…don't be oblivious to what is going on under your own roof. Keep them safe and never be afraid of shutting down an account or deciding to change your mind and say no if you see a potential danger…it is your right and responsibility as a parent***
I'm reminded of 1 Corinthians 10:23 "Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial. Everything is permissible, but not everything is constructive."
I could write a ton of what my own convictions are or speak from some of my soap boxes but why? I mean, really, they are just that my opinions. Rather, around my house these days I keep directing my girls to the Word of God which is always correct and always perfect. Never a word misspoken…just Truth. My opinions are just that, my opinions.
When faced today with a crazy insane amount of choices thrown our way as parents. Every day we are faced with questions from our kids for a new social media site to connect to, or an new app, a new song, a new book or movie. There are so many lines, we as parents, are left asking ourselves if that is a black or white answer or is that a gray zone. Lately, when we we are asked if they can do something I have turned it around and now ask them a question. Is what you are asking us to do permissible or beneficial?
Not in a legalistic sense. Simply from a heart perspective on what will benefit them and not hold them back or make them stumble in an area.
The heart is the wellspring of life and we are to guard it. We know that out of the heart the mouth speaks….so those are truths we have learned from the beginning. To follow that line of thinking out, whatever we are putting in our hearts will come back out….eventually and inevitably.
While, you can do all the gray areas that are permissible in your life I leave them with the question…will it benefit your life? And if yes, how?
We are teaching them at this age to ask God for themselves what He has for their lives. Like I said, my oldest is 14. I have 4 years left before she goes away to college and will be making so many of her decisions on her own. I want her and and my other 2 girls to learn the voice of the Holy Spirit speaking to them on their own. To know right and wrong and to discern what is alright to put in their hearts and what is not. To decipher the difference between things that are permissible and you can get away with and the things that are beneficial. I know a few adults that could benefit from learning this lesson, too. It would save them a world of hurt and addiction.
As you are parenting your tweens and teens today, take a moment and ask yourself that same question for your own life. Is this that I am about to watch, listen to or do simply permissible or will it be beneficial in my own walk with God and then teach your kids that same concept. Give yourselves and your kids a Biblical gauge to remember when making choices.
Permissible or beneficial? Your choice.
***As a side note, if you've said yes to anything especially social media continue asking them questions, check up on their accounts to see what is going on. Always be involved and connected…don't be oblivious to what is going on under your own roof. Keep them safe and never be afraid of shutting down an account or deciding to change your mind and say no if you see a potential danger…it is your right and responsibility as a parent***
