Inspire launched last Friday night and tonight is the first time in a week that I have time to sit and write about it.
As the worship team got there and set up people started pouring in and I seemed to have an endless amount of last minute details to get together for everything to run smoothly. After all the running around and preparation, my girlfriend Erin began the worship and I immediately could feel my shoulders drop and a peace came over me....worshiping God is always my favorite place to be.
I stood up front after worship and was getting ready to speak (which, turns out, I really like speaking, who knew? Well, my husband may have had a clue that I like to speak but I never knew :) Anyways, as I looked over this big conference room filled with about 140 women, I was brought to tears at the thought that God spoke this to my heart a couple years ago and there I was standing at the front with a group of ladies worshiping God. I was humbled that He was going to work through me in this next year in lives all around this Detroit area. I was brought to tears because, as I shared that night, it was only a few years ago when I was overcome with doubt and complete brokenness and there I was....He carried me through that whole mess and set me in this place for this time despite my what if's.
I don't know if you were there or were not (I will be posting the message on youtube this week) but I thank God for this opportunity in my life and consider it such a privilege to do this! I look forward to all that God will do through this ministry this year and beyond. My heart is so full and filled with joy I cannot even express.
About 6 months ago my sister and I were talking about something silly and were just laughing...hard...really hard about it. I cannot, for the life of me, remember what it was we were talking about because we talk constantly but I do remember thinking "this is the first time since my dad had died that my sister and I had really laughed this hard together" We had always laughed before he got sick...my whole family is unbelievably funny and laughter has always been a part of my life but I realized 6 months ago when Sara and I were laughing that God had brought me finally through the worst of it and I was healing and getting to the other side. It was freeing...
There is a song by Jesus Culture called Your Love Never Fails and my favorite line in this song is
"The chasm is far too wide
I never thought I'd reach the other side
But Your love never fails..."
I've been singing this song for a couple of years now believing this line. As I've learned how to laugh again and as God has given me the privilege of starting Inspire, I have realized that His love never had failed and there I was standing in front of these ladies and I never thought I'd reach the other side...but I did...His love never failed and now I am so thankful for the opportunity to share this hope with the ladies of Inspire and all the ministries we will be serving this year and beyond.
God's love never fails and He carries us, walks with us and He infuses us with hope, peace and joy until we can laugh...really laugh hard again or maybe for the first time in our lives. He knows the chasm isn't too wide and that He will use all that we go through to comfort someone else who thinks they won't be able to make it.
You can make it. God will walk you through it to the other side. I know that now, and I am so excited to see how God pours out my life and all of yours to speak hope into those hurting around us and gives us all the opportunity to share that God's love never fails despite any and all of our chasms, what if's and brokenness.
Can't wait to see how God Inspire's each one of our own hearts to be used for His glory!
Saturday, March 9, 2013
Monday, January 28, 2013
What would happen if a group of woman came together with a dream to make a difference? What if there was a place to come and hear from God, heal our hearts and a place where we were given an opportunity to go out and help others? What if we could have a place where we pour out ourselves into other lives and make a real difference? What if we stopped asking "what if I can't" and started saying "What can I do" by pressing into God to see what He has for our lives?
That's what the heart of Inspire is. We, are a group of ladies from ages 13 to 93, coming together for the first month to worship God, listen to the vision of this ministry and see where God takes us to serve in the Metro Detroit area all while making a few friends along the way to live life with.
Come out, bring some friends and invite a few more and see what we are doing, find out some details, ask some questions, meet with God and see how He can use your life story and purpose to help somebody else find theirs...
Our Inspire promo coming soon...
Feel free to post and pass this invite to as many woman as you know who want to come join us and see what we are up to. Also, email me with any questions. As we get closer to the date I will need to know the number of people coming so please RSVP.
We are meeting at the Macomb Community University Center at the Center campus. Doors open at 6 and we begin at 6:30.
Come out and see what happens when a bunch of girls in God come together united for such a time as this…… http://www.facebook.com/events/436815853057025/
That's what the heart of Inspire is. We, are a group of ladies from ages 13 to 93, coming together for the first month to worship God, listen to the vision of this ministry and see where God takes us to serve in the Metro Detroit area all while making a few friends along the way to live life with.
Come out, bring some friends and invite a few more and see what we are doing, find out some details, ask some questions, meet with God and see how He can use your life story and purpose to help somebody else find theirs...
Our Inspire promo coming soon...
Feel free to post and pass this invite to as many woman as you know who want to come join us and see what we are up to. Also, email me with any questions. As we get closer to the date I will need to know the number of people coming so please RSVP.
We are meeting at the Macomb Community University Center at the Center campus. Doors open at 6 and we begin at 6:30.
Come out and see what happens when a bunch of girls in God come together united for such a time as this…… http://www.facebook.com/events/436815853057025/
Monday, January 7, 2013
Happy New Year - A "do over"
Happy New Year! I love new beginnings, don't you? I love fresh starts, clean slates and empty canvases to start anew, start fresh or just start over. I remember being a kid and playing tag or hide and seek with my neighbor friends and when somebody would do something wrong or something you didn't like we would just yell "do over" at the top of your lungs and everyone would stop and start over. It was like you just yelled out reset and got to redo that part of your life. Don't you wish sometimes life had a reset button? I'm kinda a kid at heart still and probably a bit of a dreamer so I tend to love the idea of a new year as an equivalent to yelling out "do over" and having the ability to reset our lives and start fresh in a new year. Kind of a fun way of looking at it!
A few years now have gone by from my own personal tragedy to realize that life doesn't always work that way by yelling out "do over". I wish it did because I would be screaming do over just to have another lunch across the table from my dad but alas there is no reset button for our lives. But we do all have something else. Something that can start on any day of any month or year not just on the 1st day of a new year. What we have is a choice. We have a choice on how we respond to the events thrown our way every day. We can choose from which perspective we want to view our situations. It really can be a life saver (really a soul saver). I seriously cannot sit here and tell you how many crazy events have happened in my life over the past few years. And each and every time another event would happen, I would say (often times out loud) 'this is not going to take me out!' As I feel like I am finally on the other side of intense brokenness, pain and disappointment, I look back and realize that each time I said that statement, I was actually asking God 'this isn't going to take me out, right God?' and it didn't. I'm here and I've made it. But if there is one single thing I have learned from the pain of loss and from life's disappointments is that God is truly always there. We have a choice to trust Him and look at them from His perspective. I know it is a simple concept but really quite profound. He is always for us. We can trust Him. He is the author of new beginnings. He truly can bring life from death. He can turn events around. He can use our horrible situations and bring Glory to Himself through our life as we walk through them and trust Him. It's like He yells out 'do over' and it really is that simple. Now, unlike when we are kids and the whole game stops and you get to really do the whole thing over again, with life, sometimes our situations don't or won't ever change but our ability to reset our thinking, our perspective, our choices in the event can. We can have a reset button and we can choose to view our situations from His vantage point. His Word.
On March 1st, 2013 I am launching an event to reach out to woman all over the metro Detroit area. We have the opportunity to come together and make a difference. We, as a group of ladies, can take our pain, our disappointments, our passions, our joy, our heart and come before God and ask Him to use us by allowing us to be His hands to help others in their pain and share our stories and more importantly share our God with woman and children all over Macomb county and greater Detroit area. After I wrote my last blog sharing my heart to come together as a group of woman, worship God and then take our lives and pour them out into hurting and broken lives, the response was overwhelming with people who want to be involved and come together! I am so happy that God is going to use all of us to be the voice that is able to yell out or maybe just whisper that God has a do over, He has a plan for life and loves people where they are at. To these woman and children in horrible situations all around us, we have an opportunity to go where God leads us and help.
More details will follow soon. Pretty much the jist of it is this. We come together (anybody, from any denomination) Friday night March 1st at 6:30, we worship (my girlfriend and her husband lead worship and they are awesome….I cannot even wait), I will share what this ministry's vision is going to look like and how we are going to do it. I will ask all of you that night to share on a form if your want to, your heart and different local outreaches/ministries that serve woman and children that you would like to see us help one month, and then we close with prayer (I have people whose heart is to just pray for woman to be whole so that will absolutely be a part of our events). God has brought together a group of awesome woman that are helping me with this event and are praying for God's leading and will for this whole thing!
My heart, as I've shared in the last blog, is to seek God more (hmmm that sounds like a song I've done…The More I Seek You…if you don't know it look it up, it's simple but pretty much the heart of this group), anyways we come seek God and worship….really worship Him (would you expect anything less from an event I would put together?;), hear what God has to say to us and then go out and help others with their 'do over' and share that all in life is not lost, that there is a God that came and died on the cross, rose again to offer a do over for their life and will offer an abundant life in the midst of their storms.
The invites for this event will be coming soon, anyone and everyone is invited so invite friends. We are meeting at Macomb Community University Center (Center campus) and the place seats 250 people so invite friends! It is Inspire 2013 where we hear (God), heal (our hearts) and help (others). It's about God making a difference in our lives, it's about God making a difference in those lives around us…..it's about a new start, a do over. Happy new year! See you soon!
Follow this blog for updates on Inspire 2013.
A few years now have gone by from my own personal tragedy to realize that life doesn't always work that way by yelling out "do over". I wish it did because I would be screaming do over just to have another lunch across the table from my dad but alas there is no reset button for our lives. But we do all have something else. Something that can start on any day of any month or year not just on the 1st day of a new year. What we have is a choice. We have a choice on how we respond to the events thrown our way every day. We can choose from which perspective we want to view our situations. It really can be a life saver (really a soul saver). I seriously cannot sit here and tell you how many crazy events have happened in my life over the past few years. And each and every time another event would happen, I would say (often times out loud) 'this is not going to take me out!' As I feel like I am finally on the other side of intense brokenness, pain and disappointment, I look back and realize that each time I said that statement, I was actually asking God 'this isn't going to take me out, right God?' and it didn't. I'm here and I've made it. But if there is one single thing I have learned from the pain of loss and from life's disappointments is that God is truly always there. We have a choice to trust Him and look at them from His perspective. I know it is a simple concept but really quite profound. He is always for us. We can trust Him. He is the author of new beginnings. He truly can bring life from death. He can turn events around. He can use our horrible situations and bring Glory to Himself through our life as we walk through them and trust Him. It's like He yells out 'do over' and it really is that simple. Now, unlike when we are kids and the whole game stops and you get to really do the whole thing over again, with life, sometimes our situations don't or won't ever change but our ability to reset our thinking, our perspective, our choices in the event can. We can have a reset button and we can choose to view our situations from His vantage point. His Word.
On March 1st, 2013 I am launching an event to reach out to woman all over the metro Detroit area. We have the opportunity to come together and make a difference. We, as a group of ladies, can take our pain, our disappointments, our passions, our joy, our heart and come before God and ask Him to use us by allowing us to be His hands to help others in their pain and share our stories and more importantly share our God with woman and children all over Macomb county and greater Detroit area. After I wrote my last blog sharing my heart to come together as a group of woman, worship God and then take our lives and pour them out into hurting and broken lives, the response was overwhelming with people who want to be involved and come together! I am so happy that God is going to use all of us to be the voice that is able to yell out or maybe just whisper that God has a do over, He has a plan for life and loves people where they are at. To these woman and children in horrible situations all around us, we have an opportunity to go where God leads us and help.
More details will follow soon. Pretty much the jist of it is this. We come together (anybody, from any denomination) Friday night March 1st at 6:30, we worship (my girlfriend and her husband lead worship and they are awesome….I cannot even wait), I will share what this ministry's vision is going to look like and how we are going to do it. I will ask all of you that night to share on a form if your want to, your heart and different local outreaches/ministries that serve woman and children that you would like to see us help one month, and then we close with prayer (I have people whose heart is to just pray for woman to be whole so that will absolutely be a part of our events). God has brought together a group of awesome woman that are helping me with this event and are praying for God's leading and will for this whole thing!
My heart, as I've shared in the last blog, is to seek God more (hmmm that sounds like a song I've done…The More I Seek You…if you don't know it look it up, it's simple but pretty much the heart of this group), anyways we come seek God and worship….really worship Him (would you expect anything less from an event I would put together?;), hear what God has to say to us and then go out and help others with their 'do over' and share that all in life is not lost, that there is a God that came and died on the cross, rose again to offer a do over for their life and will offer an abundant life in the midst of their storms.
The invites for this event will be coming soon, anyone and everyone is invited so invite friends. We are meeting at Macomb Community University Center (Center campus) and the place seats 250 people so invite friends! It is Inspire 2013 where we hear (God), heal (our hearts) and help (others). It's about God making a difference in our lives, it's about God making a difference in those lives around us…..it's about a new start, a do over. Happy new year! See you soon!
Follow this blog for updates on Inspire 2013.
Monday, November 19, 2012
Inspire a heart
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Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Captive thoughts
I generally don't write more than 1 blog a month but I'm pretty excited about what God is showing me so here I go....it'll be short.
Captive thoughts what does this mean? Well, I know what it means, but what does it mean in our own personal lives? 2 Corinthians 10:5 says this " We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. I love that but I really love how the Message Bible puts it....
"The world is unprincipled. It's dog-eat-dog out there! The world doesn't fight fair. But we don't live or fight our battles that way—never have and never will. The tools of our trade aren't for marketing or manipulation, but they are for demolishing that entire massively corrupt culture. We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ. Our tools are ready at hand for clearing the ground of every obstruction and building lives of obedience into maturity."
"...fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ"
Let that sink in for a moment (or a lifetime). I was just telling a friend a battle I went through a while back and my exact words were this "The world doesn't fight fair"! My situation at the time, was such that I kept thinking this just isn't fair that when I'm down, all these thoughts are getting thrown at me too and then I got this Scripture out and this part rang true, the world doesn't fight fair but God's Word IS fair and true, it is timeless and always works when applied to our situations in life as we walk them out.
Have you ever struggled with something in your mind? Maybe it's something everyone knows you've struggled with or maybe it's just between you and God. Nonetheless it's a struggle to keep your mind from wondering back to a thought pattern that maybe you've thought you could never overcome and has often times overcome you. Maybe it was a loose thought, emotion or impulse that you feel like you just can't get past. You can. You will. But it is a battle, but all battles have a winner and you can win. Not in your own strength or power. Not by buying a ton of self-help books (really, who are those books helping other than the ones writing them by making money), not by quietly meditating on a mountain somewhere chanting some powerless phrase...no you take every thought captive and make it obedient to God. It is an action that you take.
I know what you're asking now....so I have to take the thought captive one time and I'm done with it right? Wrong. Sometimes, in different seasons of my life, I've had to take the same thought captive over and over again 100 hundred times a day until I overcame a wrong way of thinking. Taking your thoughts captive you can turn it around by taking God's Word and applying it to your thoughts until you overcome those thoughts and begin thinking on whatever is true, whatever is lovely, whatever is noble (those are the thoughts we are to be thinking on Phil 4:8). In other words, you can replace the lies that are going through your head about yourself or how others view you or your shortcomings that you feel and replace them with how God views you and your situations. He loves you, He has good thoughts for you and a purpose for you He, daughter, is enthralled with your beauty, you are an overcomer, victorious not defeated...the list goes on and on!
Renew your mind daily with God's Word and don't give up hope. You can overcome wrong thinking patterns...keep pressing in and meditating on scriptures that give life, hope and healing (even for your broken thoughts). And, by the way, if there is something you are really struggling with that nobody knows about, find someone you trust and is a strong Christian (a good friend, a pastor, family member or your spouse) and tell them you are struggling so you can have somebody to be accountable to. I am thankful for a couple of amazing people in my life who will speak truth into my crazy thoughts (even if it hurts a little to hear from time to time).
Press on sisters!! God has awesome things in store for you! Don't grow weary in the battle!! :)
Captive thoughts what does this mean? Well, I know what it means, but what does it mean in our own personal lives? 2 Corinthians 10:5 says this " We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. I love that but I really love how the Message Bible puts it....
"The world is unprincipled. It's dog-eat-dog out there! The world doesn't fight fair. But we don't live or fight our battles that way—never have and never will. The tools of our trade aren't for marketing or manipulation, but they are for demolishing that entire massively corrupt culture. We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ. Our tools are ready at hand for clearing the ground of every obstruction and building lives of obedience into maturity."
"...fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ"
Let that sink in for a moment (or a lifetime). I was just telling a friend a battle I went through a while back and my exact words were this "The world doesn't fight fair"! My situation at the time, was such that I kept thinking this just isn't fair that when I'm down, all these thoughts are getting thrown at me too and then I got this Scripture out and this part rang true, the world doesn't fight fair but God's Word IS fair and true, it is timeless and always works when applied to our situations in life as we walk them out.
Have you ever struggled with something in your mind? Maybe it's something everyone knows you've struggled with or maybe it's just between you and God. Nonetheless it's a struggle to keep your mind from wondering back to a thought pattern that maybe you've thought you could never overcome and has often times overcome you. Maybe it was a loose thought, emotion or impulse that you feel like you just can't get past. You can. You will. But it is a battle, but all battles have a winner and you can win. Not in your own strength or power. Not by buying a ton of self-help books (really, who are those books helping other than the ones writing them by making money), not by quietly meditating on a mountain somewhere chanting some powerless phrase...no you take every thought captive and make it obedient to God. It is an action that you take.
I know what you're asking now....so I have to take the thought captive one time and I'm done with it right? Wrong. Sometimes, in different seasons of my life, I've had to take the same thought captive over and over again 100 hundred times a day until I overcame a wrong way of thinking. Taking your thoughts captive you can turn it around by taking God's Word and applying it to your thoughts until you overcome those thoughts and begin thinking on whatever is true, whatever is lovely, whatever is noble (those are the thoughts we are to be thinking on Phil 4:8). In other words, you can replace the lies that are going through your head about yourself or how others view you or your shortcomings that you feel and replace them with how God views you and your situations. He loves you, He has good thoughts for you and a purpose for you He, daughter, is enthralled with your beauty, you are an overcomer, victorious not defeated...the list goes on and on!
Renew your mind daily with God's Word and don't give up hope. You can overcome wrong thinking patterns...keep pressing in and meditating on scriptures that give life, hope and healing (even for your broken thoughts). And, by the way, if there is something you are really struggling with that nobody knows about, find someone you trust and is a strong Christian (a good friend, a pastor, family member or your spouse) and tell them you are struggling so you can have somebody to be accountable to. I am thankful for a couple of amazing people in my life who will speak truth into my crazy thoughts (even if it hurts a little to hear from time to time).
Press on sisters!! God has awesome things in store for you! Don't grow weary in the battle!! :)
Friday, October 26, 2012
Choices
We are faced with choices every day. They come in different sizes...some come with ease while others bring difficulty and heartbreak. From choices to hit the snooze one more time on a dark rainy morning, to what kind of coffee to drink, what to wear or eat today, what road to take during construction to more difficult choices like where to send your kids to school, where to move (or should you move), should you tell a friend her husband is cheating on her or even harder should we take a family member home to pass peacefully, free from hospital commotion? The list goes on and on. You get the point, choices come in all different shapes in sizes. Some of them are so completely common that we choose without even giving thought to them while others are painstakingly long processes in order to make the right choices. Some choices effect other choices. They are personal to you and your life and your preferences.
I have been leading a Bible study on the book of James for about 7 weeks now. This is probably one of my favorite books of the Bible. For someone like me, who likes things to be said direct and succinctly, it gives me more than ample directions. I love that. What I didn't expect to learn throughout the study is the backround as to why James was giving the directions, who his audience was and who he was "emulating" if you will. If you look at Matthew 5-7, the sermon on the mount you will see Jesus, James' big, half brother giving a list of instructions. If you are like me and love to run down a mental (or written) checklist of what you are doing, then you love both the book of James and even more Jesus' words in this portion of scripture. All it takes to live a holy life and get all "A's in your Christian walk is to follow these rules to a "T" right? Simple. I like clean clear cut direction.
What I didn't anticipate learning from this study but more importantly from the last few years of my messy valley of a life is that it takes so much more than reading my list of rules, checking them off and going about my day. It takes a...choice to live them out from a heart perspective and not a mind perspective. Living as though they are in your heart is different then running through a list of do's and don'ts in your mind. When faced with anything deep, intense or emotionally time consuming in life you have a choice that you can begin to look at the Word of God with a different perspective maybe with a little more heart than mind. I've had so many conversations where Christians condone what they feel is permissible in their walk with God without falling into sin. In other words, people often ask what can I get away with...what are the gray areas that maybe are not in black and white in the sermon on the mount, the book of James or the whole Bible for that matter?
As I've walked through some pretty intense emotions of loss, I realized something that I thought I already knew but now is my reality that I am so thankful for. You can run down a list of do's and don'ts, you can try to walk as close to the line as you can without falling into sin to be "culturally relevant", you can even pretty it up and make it look like you are saving the world on the outside but the truth of the matter is this, if you are not doing any of it from a pure heart than it is useless and no better than the Pharisees keeping the law. The Bible says the heart is deceitful above all else and who can know it? (Jer 17:9). The choices we make in our Christian walk go beyond our own ability to check off a list of rules as to how to have a great a Christian walk in front of people. Our choices come in the quiet moments alone with God....when it is you and Him and He alone knows why you are doing the things you do. Are you doing them for public affirmation, are you doing them because you feel like you have something or someone to prove yourself to, are you doing them because you feel like He wouldn't love you if you didn't do them so you are working for his love out of your insecurities or are you just truly doing them out of obligation or religion or are you staying so busy doing things in effort to keep yourself from dealing with the bigger issues at hand? I've done all of them at different times in life to varying degrees. Your heart can deceive you. My heart has deceived me.
I think through the last few years of my life and I was often times just barely surviving, thanking God that I had a relationship with Him before this storm had taken place. I knew my choices to hold onto Him were coming out of a place of brokeness & necessity to remain somewhat sane (although the person I had been before was quickly changing) in the midst of my pain I could never have imagined the depth it would bring that I so desperately needed in my life and then it would also expose so many ways my heart had deceived me and it was ugly. My prayers now have been 'search me oh God, and KNOW my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts See if there is ANY offensive way in me..... Psalm 139 (of course) 23-24 and then get rid of it God..all the ugly stuff. Let God check your heart when making choices in your walk with Him. Let your prayer be that God would reveal your own heart motives to you with every choice you make whether you are walking on a mountain or through a valley.
It goes so far beyond whether or not you can get an "A" for all the rules you follow. Even more heartbreaking is the scripture in James 1:23-24 when he said "Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like." So, you just have an illusion of a walk with God but are forgetting what it says when making difficult choices in life. What good is having a form of godliness but denying its power? How can somebody have a form of godliness but deny its power? They haven't dealt with their heart motives. Choosing to just follow a list of rules without ever letting God transform your heart, or letting Him search your heart will render you powerless and empty. Choose to let the Word of God sink deep into your heart and allow Him to change your heart, heal you, lead you from the inside out, it may mean you will still make mistakes. Scratch that....you will make mistakes but from the depths of your heart, cry out to walk this life and make choices that honor Him...not because it's the "right" thing to do or because this is just the way you've always done it but because He has truly transformed your heart and you are serving Him because you truly love Him and want to do all the things we read about in His word. So, in all the choices you make daily choose to have a heart following after God, after all, it is so much more fulfilling than an all A report card with no heart transformation.
I have been leading a Bible study on the book of James for about 7 weeks now. This is probably one of my favorite books of the Bible. For someone like me, who likes things to be said direct and succinctly, it gives me more than ample directions. I love that. What I didn't expect to learn throughout the study is the backround as to why James was giving the directions, who his audience was and who he was "emulating" if you will. If you look at Matthew 5-7, the sermon on the mount you will see Jesus, James' big, half brother giving a list of instructions. If you are like me and love to run down a mental (or written) checklist of what you are doing, then you love both the book of James and even more Jesus' words in this portion of scripture. All it takes to live a holy life and get all "A's in your Christian walk is to follow these rules to a "T" right? Simple. I like clean clear cut direction.
What I didn't anticipate learning from this study but more importantly from the last few years of my messy valley of a life is that it takes so much more than reading my list of rules, checking them off and going about my day. It takes a...choice to live them out from a heart perspective and not a mind perspective. Living as though they are in your heart is different then running through a list of do's and don'ts in your mind. When faced with anything deep, intense or emotionally time consuming in life you have a choice that you can begin to look at the Word of God with a different perspective maybe with a little more heart than mind. I've had so many conversations where Christians condone what they feel is permissible in their walk with God without falling into sin. In other words, people often ask what can I get away with...what are the gray areas that maybe are not in black and white in the sermon on the mount, the book of James or the whole Bible for that matter?
As I've walked through some pretty intense emotions of loss, I realized something that I thought I already knew but now is my reality that I am so thankful for. You can run down a list of do's and don'ts, you can try to walk as close to the line as you can without falling into sin to be "culturally relevant", you can even pretty it up and make it look like you are saving the world on the outside but the truth of the matter is this, if you are not doing any of it from a pure heart than it is useless and no better than the Pharisees keeping the law. The Bible says the heart is deceitful above all else and who can know it? (Jer 17:9). The choices we make in our Christian walk go beyond our own ability to check off a list of rules as to how to have a great a Christian walk in front of people. Our choices come in the quiet moments alone with God....when it is you and Him and He alone knows why you are doing the things you do. Are you doing them for public affirmation, are you doing them because you feel like you have something or someone to prove yourself to, are you doing them because you feel like He wouldn't love you if you didn't do them so you are working for his love out of your insecurities or are you just truly doing them out of obligation or religion or are you staying so busy doing things in effort to keep yourself from dealing with the bigger issues at hand? I've done all of them at different times in life to varying degrees. Your heart can deceive you. My heart has deceived me.
I think through the last few years of my life and I was often times just barely surviving, thanking God that I had a relationship with Him before this storm had taken place. I knew my choices to hold onto Him were coming out of a place of brokeness & necessity to remain somewhat sane (although the person I had been before was quickly changing) in the midst of my pain I could never have imagined the depth it would bring that I so desperately needed in my life and then it would also expose so many ways my heart had deceived me and it was ugly. My prayers now have been 'search me oh God, and KNOW my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts See if there is ANY offensive way in me..... Psalm 139 (of course) 23-24 and then get rid of it God..all the ugly stuff. Let God check your heart when making choices in your walk with Him. Let your prayer be that God would reveal your own heart motives to you with every choice you make whether you are walking on a mountain or through a valley.
It goes so far beyond whether or not you can get an "A" for all the rules you follow. Even more heartbreaking is the scripture in James 1:23-24 when he said "Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like." So, you just have an illusion of a walk with God but are forgetting what it says when making difficult choices in life. What good is having a form of godliness but denying its power? How can somebody have a form of godliness but deny its power? They haven't dealt with their heart motives. Choosing to just follow a list of rules without ever letting God transform your heart, or letting Him search your heart will render you powerless and empty. Choose to let the Word of God sink deep into your heart and allow Him to change your heart, heal you, lead you from the inside out, it may mean you will still make mistakes. Scratch that....you will make mistakes but from the depths of your heart, cry out to walk this life and make choices that honor Him...not because it's the "right" thing to do or because this is just the way you've always done it but because He has truly transformed your heart and you are serving Him because you truly love Him and want to do all the things we read about in His word. So, in all the choices you make daily choose to have a heart following after God, after all, it is so much more fulfilling than an all A report card with no heart transformation.
Monday, October 1, 2012
Married with Children
My oldest daughter will be 13 next month. My husband and I are looking at each other in amazement wondering how time can fly so quick and how in the world a couple of 25 year olds can have a 13 year old? But time keeps moving, fast. Throughout our marriage we have been asked a million and one times by friends and outsiders how our marriage works out this great, how it is we are more than thrilled to have all girls and how is there not more drama in the whole process of raising them?
We often laugh when people ask why we aren't complaining about each others Idiosyncrasies or why we aren't complaining about how "difficult" it is to raise girls. The very quick follow up to these questions are often one of two responses. One, well you must have just married a really great husband and two, we must have been lucky to get 3 easy personality types with our girls. Those responses are always followed up with a warning of just wait til they are teens because you are going to be in so much trouble with all those girls!
I have 3 responses to these statements.
Marriage. Isn't it funny when people do not want to work at something they look around at what everybody else has and will complain that they don't have that same thing. What this person maybe does not realize is that anything that is good requires work. Lots of work. Yes, it can be fun (Jim & I are living proof of that) but that is because we have worked hard at our marriage. It doesn't happen by accident...it is intentional. It is a commitment to talk everything out, choose to spend time together, pray together, and most importantly to put God first, then your spouse (not yourself). Choose to laugh together, choose to not take everything so seriously or pick apart your spouses faults...pick up a mirror and realize you are not perfect either. Value each others opinions and dreams....take time to dream together and realize when you made a commitment to each other, your happily ever after was going to be a team effort and you will be working at it happily ever after...it won't just be an accidental, magical fairy tale. The benefits of choosing your spouse over yourself, compromising or even relinquishing your "right" to be right every single time, is unbelievably awesome when both the husband and wife are doing the same thing at the same time.
Children. Daddies, pour into your baby girls, your elementary girls, your jr high girls and, yes, even your high school aged girls. They need and crave your input! Tell them their value and worth to you and your wife and to your family! Say I love you. Often. If you don't they will find someone who does. Tell them it is alright or better yet expected from them to be modest. That your girls are worth being fought for and deserve a man who treats them with respect. Show them the love of an unconditional father...in your hands you hold the opportunity to show them in earthly terms how much their Heavenly Father loves them! You will help form how they see God the Father. Communicate. Communicate. Communicate. And, oh yeah, communicate. Start from the time they are baby girls in a crib. If you talk and listen to them talk during those little tea parties they throw every few hours, that will carry over (if you continue keeping those lines of communication open) to when they are invited to their first "real" party whatever that may look like. She will come home and tell you all the events that happened at those parties as well. Trust me, I know. I did. The good, the bad, the ugly, the tears, the pain, the drama, my dad heard it all. Jim hears it all from our 3 sweet little girls. He loves every moment of it. My dad did too. Choose to be intentional in your relationship with your daughters.
Ok, moms, you are not off the hook when it comes to raising your daughters! 95% of the time it is other ladies who tell me the dread they feel in the relationship with their daughters. Why? This may sting a little, but most of the time it is because their daughters are a direct reflection of the mom and what that mother did in raising their girls. Moms, your daughters are watching your every move to see how they are suppose to act as girls, young ladies and as woman. Be an example. Period. Be a Godly example. Walk out in front of them how they are suppose to handle situations, both positive and negative. However you want your girls to act like, you must act like! I remember waking up for school every day as a kid and going to my back family room and would see my mom with a cup of coffee, open Bible on her lap as she would turn to me and smile and say she was talking to Jesus, he calls me Margaret and I'm listening to Him. Show them how to love the mess out of Jesus, show them how to walk out purpose in their lives, show them how to dress appropriately, show them how to love unconditionally, show them how to laugh at themselves and not take life so seriously, show them it is possible as ladies to live drama free lives, show them what an intentional, passionate purpose filled life looks like, show them how to overlook an offense and how to be a wife, friend, sister, daughter, overcomer! Don't compete with your girls for attention. Ever. Build them up and encourage them with your words. Notice I've said "show" them? Daughters will watch your every move to see if your life is real and sincere....they don't want to hear you say, do something, when you are not showing them that you yourself aren't willing to do it. You will lose credibility. Live your life in front of them. That's not to say you won't go through trials. You will. Go through them together...show your daughters how to go through the storms of life with grace....that is the biggest lesson my mom has shown me in her pain. How to hold on to Jesus through storms and receive his grace and strength through each season both good and bad. I can hope & pray that I can give my girls the same gift.
All this to say, if you didn't have this growing up or do not have this right now with your marriage or with your daughters, God is the God of second, third, one hundred chances. Today is the day you can start making a difference in your marriage and in the lives of your kids! You can do it. Open up your Bible and it has tons of instructions as to what love looks like, how to be a great wife or husband or parent. Grab a friend who can help keep you accountable where you feel like maybe you are falling short. Do not condemn yourself....every morning God's mercy is new for that day! You can receive that mercy and extend it to everyone else in your family....you will be pleasantly surprised at the responses and outcomes!
Much love,
Amy
We often laugh when people ask why we aren't complaining about each others Idiosyncrasies or why we aren't complaining about how "difficult" it is to raise girls. The very quick follow up to these questions are often one of two responses. One, well you must have just married a really great husband and two, we must have been lucky to get 3 easy personality types with our girls. Those responses are always followed up with a warning of just wait til they are teens because you are going to be in so much trouble with all those girls!
I have 3 responses to these statements.
Marriage. Isn't it funny when people do not want to work at something they look around at what everybody else has and will complain that they don't have that same thing. What this person maybe does not realize is that anything that is good requires work. Lots of work. Yes, it can be fun (Jim & I are living proof of that) but that is because we have worked hard at our marriage. It doesn't happen by accident...it is intentional. It is a commitment to talk everything out, choose to spend time together, pray together, and most importantly to put God first, then your spouse (not yourself). Choose to laugh together, choose to not take everything so seriously or pick apart your spouses faults...pick up a mirror and realize you are not perfect either. Value each others opinions and dreams....take time to dream together and realize when you made a commitment to each other, your happily ever after was going to be a team effort and you will be working at it happily ever after...it won't just be an accidental, magical fairy tale. The benefits of choosing your spouse over yourself, compromising or even relinquishing your "right" to be right every single time, is unbelievably awesome when both the husband and wife are doing the same thing at the same time.
Children. Daddies, pour into your baby girls, your elementary girls, your jr high girls and, yes, even your high school aged girls. They need and crave your input! Tell them their value and worth to you and your wife and to your family! Say I love you. Often. If you don't they will find someone who does. Tell them it is alright or better yet expected from them to be modest. That your girls are worth being fought for and deserve a man who treats them with respect. Show them the love of an unconditional father...in your hands you hold the opportunity to show them in earthly terms how much their Heavenly Father loves them! You will help form how they see God the Father. Communicate. Communicate. Communicate. And, oh yeah, communicate. Start from the time they are baby girls in a crib. If you talk and listen to them talk during those little tea parties they throw every few hours, that will carry over (if you continue keeping those lines of communication open) to when they are invited to their first "real" party whatever that may look like. She will come home and tell you all the events that happened at those parties as well. Trust me, I know. I did. The good, the bad, the ugly, the tears, the pain, the drama, my dad heard it all. Jim hears it all from our 3 sweet little girls. He loves every moment of it. My dad did too. Choose to be intentional in your relationship with your daughters.
Ok, moms, you are not off the hook when it comes to raising your daughters! 95% of the time it is other ladies who tell me the dread they feel in the relationship with their daughters. Why? This may sting a little, but most of the time it is because their daughters are a direct reflection of the mom and what that mother did in raising their girls. Moms, your daughters are watching your every move to see how they are suppose to act as girls, young ladies and as woman. Be an example. Period. Be a Godly example. Walk out in front of them how they are suppose to handle situations, both positive and negative. However you want your girls to act like, you must act like! I remember waking up for school every day as a kid and going to my back family room and would see my mom with a cup of coffee, open Bible on her lap as she would turn to me and smile and say she was talking to Jesus, he calls me Margaret and I'm listening to Him. Show them how to love the mess out of Jesus, show them how to walk out purpose in their lives, show them how to dress appropriately, show them how to love unconditionally, show them how to laugh at themselves and not take life so seriously, show them it is possible as ladies to live drama free lives, show them what an intentional, passionate purpose filled life looks like, show them how to overlook an offense and how to be a wife, friend, sister, daughter, overcomer! Don't compete with your girls for attention. Ever. Build them up and encourage them with your words. Notice I've said "show" them? Daughters will watch your every move to see if your life is real and sincere....they don't want to hear you say, do something, when you are not showing them that you yourself aren't willing to do it. You will lose credibility. Live your life in front of them. That's not to say you won't go through trials. You will. Go through them together...show your daughters how to go through the storms of life with grace....that is the biggest lesson my mom has shown me in her pain. How to hold on to Jesus through storms and receive his grace and strength through each season both good and bad. I can hope & pray that I can give my girls the same gift.
All this to say, if you didn't have this growing up or do not have this right now with your marriage or with your daughters, God is the God of second, third, one hundred chances. Today is the day you can start making a difference in your marriage and in the lives of your kids! You can do it. Open up your Bible and it has tons of instructions as to what love looks like, how to be a great wife or husband or parent. Grab a friend who can help keep you accountable where you feel like maybe you are falling short. Do not condemn yourself....every morning God's mercy is new for that day! You can receive that mercy and extend it to everyone else in your family....you will be pleasantly surprised at the responses and outcomes!
Much love,
Amy
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